Remember those awkward first conversations where you don’t know what to say and want to say something clever or funny. Same goes for when you first text someone.
Imagine you just met someone on WhatsApp and want to tell a few WhatsApp jokes to get the conversation going a bit. That’s where I come in and help you think of great jokes along with a few WhatsApp quotes that can make you appear more insightful.
Keep in mind that the jokes and quotes below are based on my sense of humor and what I think are the best, if you like other ones it would be great if you could put them in a comment below. I always like to see other people’s sense of humor and hopefully it will help other people out if they have a similar sense of humor.
If you’ve never used WhatsApp before I’ll walk you through some of the major features and tips on how to use it better. Remember that ultimately the app is as powerful as your friends or who you meet on the app. It’s simply an avenue for you to interact with your current friends and to meet new people from around the world.
WhatsApp Features
If you’re new to WhatsApp, go ahead and tap on the app store on your smartphone or tablet and download it. You will need to verify your phone number and account as well as come up with a good username. From there, you can import your current contacts so it can find who you already know uses WhatsApp. The app allows you to do a number of things, including:
- You can send unlimited free texts, videos, pictures, video chat, audio call, and group chat. The app uses whatever data your phone is using. So if you’re on WiFi, it will work on that and you won’t be charged for any data. If you’re out and about you will likely be using your cellular data so make sure you’re not about to go over.
- One of the best features of WhatsApp is that it is completely free and has absolutely no ads for the first year. Every year after that it is $0.99 and still no ads!
- You don’t have to remember a username and pin as the account is linked to your phone number. So you never have to log in and out and enter in a pin. It’s always logged in.
Now, let’s get into these tips to creating your own WhatsApp jokes, hopefully with the tips below you will be funnier and make your friends, girlfriend, or boyfriend laugh a bit more.
Tips To Telling WhatsApp Jokes
Below are tips to telling awesome WhatsApp Jokes. I hope this helps you come up with your own great ones.
1. There is a certain strategy when it comes to telling a joke, which can differ depending on your personality and what your target audience is. The first step is to understand on the fly what your target audience is. For instance if you’re telling a joke to a friend it will be different than to your mother, or grandmother, or girlfriend/boyfriend or child. Tailor your joke to the person so that it has the most effectiveness.
2. Now there are two types of joke lengths, one is where you set the initial background of the joke, telling sort of a story, then building to the punchline of the joke. These jokes often are best in person. I would stick with one liners for WhatsApp jokes as there isn’t as much control on building to a joke.
3. You’re ready for your one liner and gauged your audience. Now you will want to use something in context, ideally. If there is something that you’re talking about that you can make a joke about that is the best and likely the most effective joke. Try to play off something someone said.
4. You will want to think of the strategy of the joke now. You can exaggerate something your friend has said to make it into a joke. You can tease them about something if you’d like to try to flirt with them. You can always be sarcastic and say something that doesn’t fit in with the norm. There are a variety of options but make sure you use one that you’re comfortable with.
5. One of the best options is to watch some standup comedy or read jokes online to get your humor going, it’s a lot easier to come up with a great joke if you’ve just heard a bunch of them.
Funny WhatsApp Jokes
Below are some of the best jokes around. As always, humor is different in everyone, but I hope you find some to be funny. They can be good starting points if you want to use them on WhatsApp. The jokes below are compiled from Reddit, one of the best sources of jokes.
- Steve Erwin died as he lived…with animals in his heart
- Why was the ink blot upset? Because his father was in the pen and he didn’t know how long the sentence would be.
- A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building…He yells “Don’t do it! You have so much potential!”
- If Al Gore tried his hand as a musician, his album would be called…Algorithms.
- Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make…Then they call me ugly and poor.
- What is the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter? With Twitter you only get 140 characters.
Those are just a few of the awesome jokes on Reddit, check it out for hundreds of them. Note, though that some are a bit inappropriate and you may need a thick skin for some of them. Remember that when you tell your joke on WhatsApp it has to be tailored to you and fit your personality. It’s pretty clear when someone tells a joke that doesn’t fit in line with their personality or isn’t something they would normally say.
Best WhatsApp Quotes
If you like quotes then hopefully I can give you some tips for coming up with your own quotes and give you some of the best quotes I’ve heard. There are a huge variety of WhatsApp quotes that can be told, but often times quotes are observations about life that one has through experience or introspective reflection.
One of the downsides to quotes is that in most cases you have to be famous for your quotes to be heard or valued. From the jokes above, they were all random people who told great jokes, they weren’t famous or super rich, they were just ordinary people. That’s what I love about jokes. On the other hand, quotes can make you think a little deeper about something and even change your life. However, they’re often quotes from famous people that get heard and repeated. Hopefully that can change with a more open world through the internet.
What Makes a great quote?
These are my opinions on what features I’ve seen make great quotes.
- Great quotes are often told by famous or very successful people. A quote from an idol is often much more impactful.
- If you want to come up with your own quote, base it on experiences and lessons learned in your life. That is often why older people are better at creating quotes, they’ve seen a lot more, experienced a lot more, and have had a lot more time to reflect on their life.
- Most impactful quotes between 1 and 3 sentences. Not many people have the patience for a page long quote, and it often times looses it’s punch if it’s too long.
- The best quotes focus in one innate human behaviors or psyche, which we all share and can all relate to.
- It’s better if your quote is not tied too strictly to one era, unless it describes a certain event. For example a quote about VHS tapes is not much use these days.
Best WhatsApp Quotes
Below are some of the best quotes you can drop on your WhatsApp conversation and wow your friends. Some are specifically from WhatsApp conversations and some are general quotes.
- We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. (Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night)
- Love is cute when it’s new, but love is most beautiful when it lasts. (Unknown)
- Sometimes, the wrong choices take us to the right places. (Unknown)
- You don’t learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing, and by falling over. (Richard Branson)
- Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated. (Confucius)
I hope you liked some of these quotes and can use them on your next WhatsApp conversation. Different quotes will have different meaning for some people and as always, you may find some more powerful than others. Read through dozens of quotes and really think about them. Think about which ones are meaningful and then ask yourself why they’re meaningful. You may get some good insights about yourself that you never thought of before.
- I wish I could loose weight as easy as I lose my pens, keys, smartphone, my temper and even my mind.
- You can’t hire someone else to do your push-ups for you.
- Don’t Copy My Style.
- One day I really want to say- I MADE IT.
- Find out Who is Calling You
- The greatest advantage of speaking the truth is that you don’t have to remember what you said.
- Don’t check my status, look into my heart.
- I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.
- First love is important but last love is very important.
- You can love with all your heart, No questions asked.
- Always respects your self-respect and be proud.
- Follow your heart but take your brain with you.
- All problems become smaller if you don’t dodge them but confront them.
- Choose the work you love and you will never have to work every day.
- In order to success your desire to success should be greater than your fear of failure.
- I come up with the best ideas when sitting on the toilet then forget them after the flush.
- Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?
- My heart is stolen…can I check your bra…….
- Don’t tell me I have a dirty mind. It’s just my imagination.
- If you don’t succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.
- There is only happiness in this life, to love and be loved.
- I’m goanna rest of my life, the best of my life.
- When you are tired and done and feel like giving up remember why you never gave it up for so long.
- Life is short, make fun of it.
- Don’t wait for last judgment. It happened every day.
- Face book is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall
- Friendship comes when silence between two people is there.
- Don’t let a bad day make you feel like you have a bad life.
- Next Whatsapp Quotes will be on these Categories.
- Be the type of person you want to meet.
- If the facts don’t fit the theory, change the facts.
- Sometimes you succeed and other times you learns.
- Every day may not be good but there is something good in every day.
- In “Success” all depends on the second letter.
- The first duty of LOVE is to LISTEN.
- Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad. True story.
- Just because I’m busy doesn’t mean I don’t love you
- My heart is perfect because… you are inside.
- Smile and let everyone know that today, you’re a lot stronger than you were yesterday.
- I Love My Country. It’s The Government I’m Afraid Of!
- Do it today or regret TOMORROW.
- It’s hard to answer the question “what’s wrong?'” when nothing’s right.
- I want another day with you.
- I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
- Blessed is he who talks in circles, for he shall become a big wheel.
- Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.
- Coffee, chocolate, men… some things are just better rich.
- I want patience – AND I WANT IT NOW!
- I don’t need to explain myself; I know I’m right.
- How Emotions Harm you.
- Only you can give me that feeling.
- Close your eyes, clear your heart let it go.
- I wish I could trade my heart for another liver …..so that I can drink more and care less
- 3 mistakes of everyone’s life–Facebook, Twitter and Whatsapp
- I don’t stop when I’m tried; I stop when I’m done.
- It’s not too far, it just seems like it is.
- Only relevant messages, for stupid jokes find someone else.
- The problem is not the problem; the problem is your attitude about the problem.
- It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
- You killed what was left of the good in me.
- I will marry the girl who looks as pretty as in her Adhere card (or in matrimonial sites)!!!!
- Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to Monday????
- I don’t want to fall in love with you, but stay in love with you forever.
- Do unto others before they do unto you.
- I’m nobody, nobody is perfect, and therefore I’m perfect.
- If you run into a wall. Don’t turn around and give up.
- Why worry about things you cannot change? Let go and move on, because LIFE isn’t waiting.
- Sleep all your troubles away.
- Save Water, Drink Beer!!
- I am not telling you it’s going to be easy. I am telling you it’s going to be worth it.
- If you aren’t first, you are last.
- We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like.
- The richer you get, the more expensive happiness becomes.
- I am a good boy with lots of bad habits.
- You can’t stop loving short girls.
- Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.
- Love is a journey that leads to no destination.
- It’s lonely at the top, but you eat better.
- Be yourself because an original is worth more than a copy.
- I’d explain it to you but I’m afraid your head might explode.
- The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.
- Everything is rightly confused.
- I am single because God is busy writing the best love story for me…
- Rules are made to be break.
- Marriage means silent suicide.
- I talk to myself often that way I ensure I am talking to better class of people.
- Ever read a book that changed your life? Me neither.
- Friendship is when people know all about you but like you anyway.
- When you feel Like Giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place.
- A party without cake is just a meeting.
- Do you still hate me?? I don’t care!!
- People say nothing’s impossible, but I do nothing everyday.”…..
- Man makes money. Money makes man mad.
- When God sneezed, I didn’t know what to say.
- Stop checking my status ! Go Get A Life ????
- Anger: Weakens the liver
- If you are here —who is running hell?
- I dreamed a dream.
- A fake smile can hide a million tears.
- Tip to avoid car insurance……….Join Facebook and never leave home.
- Defeat your enemies with your success.
- Never test how deep the water is with both feet.
- A conservative is a fellow who thinks a rich man should have a square deal. I hate you friend.
- I dint change, I just grew up. You should try it once 😉
- We can tell our values by looking at our checkbook stubs.
- Work hard in silence & let the success make noise.
- I hope you always find a reason to smile.
- Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it. Michael Jordan
- People who die by suicide don’t want to end there live they want to end their pain.
- If you are player then I’m the GAME.
- Oh, so you want to argue, bring it. I got my CAPS LOCK ON.
- I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
- We’re a non-profit company. It didn’t start out that way but it happened.
- Enjoy your life–there’s plenty of time to be dead.
- The PAST cannot be changes, forgotten. Edited or erased: it can only be accepted.
- Life is too short to be sitting around miserable.
- I can resist everything except temptation.
- The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
- I work for money, if you want loyalty – hire a dog.
- Life isn’t about finding yourself life is about creating yourself.
- There are three sides to an argument – your side, my side and the right side.
- I’m not weird, I’m limited edition.
- If you try to pronounce “lmao” you sound like a French cat.
- If someone you love hurts you cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it
- Me…..myself…and I..!!
- Happiness does not buy you money.
- The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.
- If you like me raise your hand, If you don’t, raise your standard.
- According to my police report, I had a great Night Out last night.
- You are the product of 4 billion years of evolution, now act like it.
- If procrastination was an Olympic event ,I’d compete in it later.
- There is no finish line so love the journey.
- I enjoy when people show Attitude to me because it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!
- The length of this document defends it well against the risk of its being read.
- Nothing in the world is more common than unsuccessful people with talent.
- You never know how strong you are…until being strong is the only choice you have.
- I like to take road less travelled…helps me to avoid traffic.
- To make your dream come true you need to wake up.
- Don’t just look at your mistakes, correct it.
- Love has no limits.
- Every problem comes with a solution. If it doesn’t have any solution, it’s a…………. Girl 🙂
- If you can dream it you can do it. – Walt Disney
- Childhood is like being drunk; everyone remembers what you did, except you.
- In love you have to listen before you feel.
- All my life a thought air was free…Until I bought a bag of chips.
- Life is like photography, you use the negatives to develop.
- A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net.
- If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn’t contain any calories.
- Knowledge is like underwear. Have It. Keep It but never show it off.
- I think love is fearless.
- Am going to Make my Status………….better you too Focus on your Status only.
- Do not be afraid to step on people… Mario made a career from it.
- Second chances are for loser’s….either we do it in first place or live it for others.
- There is no dance without the dancers.
- When you are scared of something, step into the unknown.
- I want to be your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.
- I usually take a two-hour nap, from one to four.
- Support bacteria —they’re the only culture some people have.
- I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin me.
- I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Fun is like life insurance. The older you get. The more it cost’s.
- I want you today and tomorrow and next week and for the rest of my life.
- My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.
- If you can’t the thing, Move on: D
- There are 3 types of people in the world- vegetarian, non-veterinarian & Tuesday Saturday
- Love yourself. Love your day. Love your life.
- I was pro life before I met you.
- I’m silent by nature and therefore my mind speaks the loudest.
- I never forget a face, but yours too ugly to erase from my mind.
- Contributing to entropy since 1994.
- Some people are alive only, because it’s illegal to kill them.
- Whatever it is — I didn’t do it!
- Better the vacuum cleaner the better it sucks!!
- You don’t always get what you wish for. You get what you work for.
- I make mistakes; I’ll be the second to admit it.
- Silent people have the craziest minds.
- You have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life.
- I just saved lot of money by lick life insurance. By not having any.
- Finding a best friend is tough, keeping the friendship is tougher.
- Warning…I know KARATE…….And few other oriental words.
- Be a girl with a mind, a bitch with an attitude, and a lady with class.
- I usually don’t get attached too easily, but that changes when I met you.
- Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell.
- The People who want to stay in your life will always find a way.
- One day someone will walk into your life and make you see why it never worked out with anyone else.
- The task ahead of us is never as great as the power behind us.
- Worry: Weakens the stomach
- No one realizes the beauty of love, until you’re caught in it.
- When nothing seems right….go left!!
- Sometimes I just wish I’ could fast forward the time to see if in the end it’s all worth it.
- I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.
- Never mind what I told you, you do as I tell you.
- Smile. It has the power to make your day.
- I’m not failed…my success is just postponed for some time.
- On the internet you can be anything you want, it’s strange that so many people choose to be stupid.
- If you smile when no one is around, you really mean it 🙂
- The ones who say “you can’t” and “you won’t” are probably the ones scared that “you will”.
- When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
- When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
- I love you even when I hate you.
- Results compulsorily require efforts. Efforts will not necessarily give results.
- When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it.
- Well I could agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
- Grief: Weakens the Lung
- Do a little more each day than you think you can.
- Think about it ..every time we look back at ourselves five years ago we think we were an idiot.
- Great power comes with great electricity bills.
- I am not bossy, but I love to tell you what you should do.
- Life is a game, let’s make a high score.
- Sometimes I pretend to be normal but it gets boring. So I go back to being me.
- His story is History, My Story is Mystery.
- If I’m wired with you. I like you.
- One must be a wise reader to quote wisely and well. ` Amos Bronson Alcott
- Life is short smile while you still have teeth.
- Love is just a word until someone special gives it a meaning.
- You have to be an odd one, to be number one.
- Marriage is the main cause for divorce.
- My wife and me live happily for 25 years… And then we met…!
- Life is onetime offers use it well.
- Life is planning a pleasant curve for me.
- I’d far rather be happy than right.
- Borrow money from a pessimist- – he doesn’t expect it back.
- Use MS Word Like a Master!
- I’m not your type. I’m not inflatable.
- Broken Heart Whatsapp Status- Love Hurts
- Never laugh at your wife’s choices… you’re one of them …
- Tried to loose weight…….But it keeps finding me.
- It’s the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.
- I do not exist to impress the world. I exist to live my life in a way that will make me happy.
- People say me bad…..trust me I am the worst.
- Awesome ends with Ugly starts and ME with you.
- No one rises suddenly in the World, Not Even the Sun.
- I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.
- Some Weird Websites for Killing Time
- Sometimes the wrong choice brings us to the right places.
- Mom’s logic: If you go wild and break your legs, do not run to me and cry ..
- We live in a Dumb Age where Smartphone’s are thinner and smarter, people are obese and stupid.
- Evil is obvious only in retrospect.
- So many of my smiles begin with you.
- Passion is the genesis of genius.
- I m not special, I am just a LIMITED EDITION.
- An Apple keep a day keeps the doctor away, I’m going to buy iPhone 6.
- Life is too short. Don’t waste it removing pen drive safely.
- Even Romeo went from being “in a relationship” to “it’s complicated”.
- My attitude will always be based on how you treat me.
- A true businessman always does business out of courage.
- Love thy neighbor. But don’t get caught.
- There is only 1 thing 2 do, 3 words for you – I Love You
- I am never going to talk to you again. Trusting friends like you have put me through a lot of pain.
- Love is that state of mind when a Karan josher film becomes bearable.
- We fall in love by chance. We stay in love by choice.
- The only thing I can’t stand is discomfort.
- Only brain is works more…if you use it more.
- I love my job when I am holidaying.
- Every winter I catch cold, this time I caught you in my heart.
- Reality is a crutch for people who can’t handle drugs.
- I need you, you need me. Let’s make it work.
- Don’t say you love me unless you mean it.
- Don’t ask what the meaning of life is. You define it.
- Everyone wants to park their vehicles in shade but no one wants to grow trees.
- Well, enough about me. Let’s talk about you. What do you think about me?
- Every time I look at the keyboard U and I always together.
- One more password got married…!!
- You’re pretty close to perfect when you’re standing next to me.
- She’s so fake. If you look behind her neck, I bet it says “Made in China”.
- There’s always a person that you hate for no reason.
- If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try.
- One day you’re going to wake up and notice that you should’ve tried. I was worth the fight.
- Failure is always temporary, only giving up makes it permanent.
- Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.
- I just need two holidays a year that last six months each.
- The Soul is a dream flower that opens only once in life.
- Dear Karma, I have a list of people you missed.
- Only you can work better.
- I love my job only when I’m on vacation.
- I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy saving mode.
- SI unit of ignorance = “seen”
- I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes CLOSED 🙂
- The best dreams happen when eyes are open.
- I liked things better when I didn’t understand them.
- Waiting for Wi-Fi network.
- My heart is now a perfect place… with you inside it.
- I can whistle with my fingers, especially if I have a whistle.
- Keep calm, stay happy.
- Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
- Those who snore always fall asleep first.
- If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
- I wish I had Google in my mind and antivirus in my heart.
- I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.
- Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.
- Life will give you exactly what you need, not what you want
- Cheating is easy try something challenging and be faithful.
- I am totally available! Please disturb me!
- Everything happens for a reason, so don’t disappoint.
- Error: status unavailable
- The most painful goodbyes are the ones that never said and never explained.
- Only Marriage is the major cause of divorce.
- The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dream is you.
- Don’t ever make a long term decision for your temporary emotions
- I hate math but I love counting money.
- Whenever I think of quit smoking, I need a cigarette.
- True love has a habit of coming back.
- I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
- Life is rather like a tin of sardines – we’re all of us looking for the key.
- Life is better when I’m drunk.
- It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
- I m sorry did I give u d impression that I give a damn bat u???
- Life is the art of drawing without a eraser.
- The only difference between a good day and a bad day is your attitude.
- You look like a before picture.
- Success is falling 9 times and getting up 10.
- A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
- Let all that you do be done n love.
- If I had the world in mash hands, I’d give it all to you 🙂
- I can’t go a day without thinking about you.
- Nobody can teach me who I am.
- A dog has an owner. A cat has a staff.
- I started out with nothing and I still have most of it:)
- The trouble is that you think you’ve time!
- When you make a mistake it means you’re trying.
- Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart.
- Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
- If at first, you don’t succeed… Keep flushing.
- I can see you checking my Whatsapp status. B)
- We must all make the choice between what is right and what is easy.
- Don’t waste your time looking back on what you’ve lost. Just move on.
- I need Google in my brain.
- Don’t say I Love You. Prove it.
- Hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable.
- Don’t give up what you want most, for what you want now.
- Stress: Weakens the Heart & Brain
- The only thing that overcomes hard luck is hard work. – harry Golden
- Love when you’re ready, not when you are alone.
- I’m just waiting to see to if my coffee chooses to use its powers for good or evil today.
- Should transformers take car insurance or life insurance…..
- How come there’s only one monopolies commission?
- Beauty is not in the face; beauty is alight in the heart.
- People r like music some say the truth and rest, just noise.
- I don’t get drunk, I get awesome.
- Every moment I spent with you is like a dream come true <3
- If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. _ Wayne Dyer
- Formula for success…under promise and over deliver…
- Don’t tell me to change, I can’t perfect myself anymore.
- I’m making changes in my life so if you don’t hear from me, you’re one of them.
- Love is all you need.
- The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
- A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
- Don’t wait for the moment. It will never come if you don’t know how to get it.
- Your Whatsapp status say’s online …..If your online then why aren’t you texting me
- So take a chance and don’t ever look back.
- Find what you LOVE and let it kill you
- Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if tomorrow is last one.
- The road to success is always under construction.
- Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.
- A girl must marry for love, and keep on marrying until she finds it.
- You have the perfect face for radio.
- Love is like a rubber band with people on both ends. When one leaves it hurts the other.
- I’d like to run away from you, but if you didn’t come and find me…. I would die.
- In war only the one that’s left is right.
- Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.
- If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
- When I count my blessings I count you twice.
- Without me its just also.
- I wish I could record my dreams and watch them later……
- A woman is like a tea bag; you cannot tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.
- Some people feel the rain. Others just get wet.
- To shine like the sun, you need to burn like one.
- A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.
- Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.
- To label me an intellectual is a misunderstanding of what that is.
- I never really believed in magic until I saw you for the very first time.
- If I were meant to be controlled I would have came with a remote.
- Love is fearless, but I fear of losing you.
- I just hate the fact that you hate me.
- Do what you Love, does is matter what are you doing?
- Love seems like the best thing that happened to me because its you.
- It doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.
- I’m looking for a bank loan, which can perform two things. Give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.
- When you want to give up remember why you started.
- Falling in love is only half of what I want. Staying in love with you till forever is the other.
- Life was much easier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits.
- COPA available for adoption… can’t raise it myself.
- I’m Jealous of My Parents… I’ll Never Have a Kid as Cool as Theirs!
- If Monday had a face, I would punch it.
- I’m not arguing, I’m simply tried to explaining why I’m Right.
- I’m not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.
- You’re not perfect, I am not as well, but together we are perfect.
- Life will serve you best if you love it as much as you love yourself.
- Attitude is like underwear Don’t show it just wore it…!
- We all are born to die don’t feel more special than me.
- There is no elevator to success, you have to take stairs.
- I’m a great lover, I’ll bet.
- I’m totally a cheap date; I don’t pay for anything.
- May your problems be as few and as far apart as my Gam’s teeth.
- I am the boss, but my wife is a decision-maker.
- I can and I will. Watch me!!
- If you never get your heart broken you’ll never learn to love.
- For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened.
- Hey I found your nose, it was in my business again.
- Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.
- I’m too shy at first but once I’m comfortable with you get ready for some crazy.
- Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.
- Every day is beautiful if you choose to see it.
- You can hire someone to help you build muscles, but they can’t do push-ups for you.
- Never give up on something you really want. It’s difficult to wait, but more difficult to regret.
- Life isn’t about getting and having, it’s about giving and being. –Kevin Kruse
- Brains are wonderful, why don’t have everyone.
- Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
- I wonder if I’ve met the person I’m going to marry.
- Forget what hurt you in the past. But never forget what it taught you.
- Had a really great “Night Out” last night, According to my police report.
- Fear: Weakens the Kidney.
- A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he’s finished.
- Happiness is not the absence of problems. It’s the ability to deal with them.
- Isn’t it scary that doctors call what they do “practice”?
- A true love story nerve ends.
- You have eyes my dear but you cannot see.
- Blogging as a Career
- I’m poor. I can’t pay ATTENTION in Classroom.
- When you fail, try again. This time more intelligently.
- I’ve got nothing to do today but smile. – Paul Simon
- Yeah you’re really pretty, pretty stupid.
- Stop thinking too much, it’s all right not to know all the answers.
- Every LOVE story is beautiful, but ours if my Favorite. <3
- Am I ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
- A best friend is life a four-leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have.
- Enjoy Life; there is plenty of time to be dead.
- It is not necessary to have enemies if you go out of your way to make friends hate you.
- If you love something set it free.
- People say they can’t live without Love. I think oxygen is more important.
- Giving up doesn’t always mean you are weak. Sometimes it just means you’re strong enough to let go.
- My mother always said don’t marry for money, divorce for money.
- In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life. It goes on.
- Virginity is like a soap bubble, one touch and it is gone.
- My Attitude is my born gift and nobody take from me.
- If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
- Don’t tell people your dreams, SHOW THEM!
- Don’t disturb me, I am already mentally ill.
- It’s not how we make mistakes, but how we correct them that define us.
- I am never in a bad mood, its people around me that suck.
- Yeah you ,the one reading my status. Get Lost.
- Learn How to Make Money from Internet
- I cannot give you a demo of my love. Take it or leave it.
- when I was BORN I was so surprised, I didn’t talk for a year & a half.
- I’d cross the world for someone like you.
- The zeal of friends it is that knocks me down, and not the hate of enemies.
- It’s funny how seeing you give me both Joy & sadness at the same time.
- I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by selling my car.
- The saddest thing about BETRAYAL is that it never comes from your enemies.
- Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
- You are the dream I see every morning when I wake up.
- Someone Asked me what is UR attitude…… then I simply replied… ” BEING SINGLE IS MY ATTITUDE…”
- When nothing goes right, go left!
- Be polite to everyone don’t sweat the small stuff, and be positive-it’s contagious!
- Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.` Maya Angelou
- Love your girl like you love your Coffee… Enjoy it before its hotness goes.
- Never do anything yourself that others can do for you.
- Comparison is the thief of joy.
- Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
- Speak truth. You don’t have to remember what you said.
- LOVING MIGHT BE A MISTAKE, BUT IT’S WORTH MAKING.!
- When I am good I am best , when I am bad I am worst.
- My attitude depends on the people in front of me….””
- 80% boys have a girlfriend and rest have a brain..
- Stop saying I wish start saying I will.
- Did you get any text messages last night? Oh! My phone was drunk.
- I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile then walk into a pole. 😀
- Do you know the root cause of your divorce? Marriage.
- I believe in hate at first sight.
- I don’t care what people think or say about me, I was not born on this earth to please everybody.
- It only hurts when you love someone and you know they don’t love you back.
- Life is too short to remove USB safely.
- I have a new theory in life…what other people think of me is truly none of my business!
- Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills.
- I can’t find the reason why I like you. I believe that’s what love does.
- Don’t confuse having a career with having a life.
- The minute you think of giving up think of the reason why you held on so long.
- I am so poor that I can’t pay attention in class.
- Met you by fate, chose you as a friend, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.
- The lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math.
- If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it.
- You cannot receive happiness until you let go the pain.
- A promise means everything but once it is broken sorry means nothing.
- One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
- I’m cool but global warming made me hot
- You can disturb me….I’m available. 😀
- He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
- I took IQ test …..results were negative
- Laziness is me middle name.
- No one is the reason of your happiness expect you yourself.
- Etc.= End of thinking Capacity.
- I don’t insult people, I just describe them””
- People said to follow your dreams so I went back to bed.
- I don’t even know why I like you. But I just do.
- Look at the keyboard. U and I will always be together.
- The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
- The most important Shareholder in your life is you.
- We all get addicted to something that takes away the pain.
- Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
- Can I borrow a Kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.
- Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
- You are the reason behind my smile.
- I need you so much closer.
- Love means exposing yourself to the pain of being hurt by someone you trust.
- Love marriage is like dancing in front of snake and asking him to bite.
- Every organization is perfectly designed to get the results they are getting.
- People don’t cheat by chance, they cheat by choice.
- Love me for a second and I’ll love you forever.
- Sorry vegetarians we can’t pretend
- 3 AM my cell is ringing…hey there you asleep?? No I’m Skydiving.
- I’m born to express, not to impress.
- When you get to the end of the rope, tie a knot and hang on. Theodore Roosevelt
- I Am Not Special, I Am Just Limited Edition: P
- War doesn’t determine who’s right. War determines who’s left.
- Everybody knows how to love, but only few know how to love forever.
- If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.
- Every love story is beautiful but ours is my favorite.
- If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up.
- All Experience is an arch to build upon
- If I get jealous then yes I really like you.
- Train your mind to see good in everything.
- I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
- If people are trying to bring you ‘Down’, It only means that you are ‘Above them’.
- You can do anything but not everything.
- Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
- Everybody repeats after me: “We are all individuals.”
- Love conquers all things let us too surrender to love.
- Hey Mate…you There…Whatsapp is using me. : D
- The best way to create your future is to create it
- If you like me, then raise your hand, If not then raise your standard.
- If “Plan A” didn’t work. The alphabet has 25 more letters. Stay Cool!!
- Which one of these is the non-smoking lifeboat?
- Life is a roller coaster inside of a maze.
- I’ll never forget the first time I saw you.
- Love is like the sun coming out of the clouds and warming your soul. – Anonymous
- All I need is your love.
- I don’t have a personality problem. I have an attitude.
- His I.Q. is so low you can’t test it. You have to dig for it.
- Positivity is contagious. Try it.
- Study economics-when you’re unemployed, at least you’ll know why.
- Log kyat change has killed more dreams than anything else.
- Hurt me with a truth; don’t comfort me with a lie.
- When everything comes your way. Then you are on the wrong way.
- If the world is ending today, how come Australia is in tomorrow already?
- Famous Romantic Status for Whatsapp
- There’s nothing wrong with you there’s a lot wrong with the world you live in- Chris Colder
- The world belongs to those people who know to adapt.
- Fund love, found sadness at the end of the line. – Wynn Owen Justin
- Love can be demonstrated not defined.
- We repair what your husband fixed. (Plumbing company motto.)
- Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal this status.
- I like when you smile, but I love it when I’m the reason.
- I’m not messy. I’m organizationally challenged!
- Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
- So far, this is the oldest I’ve been.
- Eat…sleep…. regret…repeat.
- When Sum One Hates You for no reason……………..Give them a reason 😛 😀 _!_
- I fell in love at first sight. I should have looked twice.
- Why 90% girls are stupid- By Stupid Girl.
- It is better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not.
- Take a deep breath it’s just a bad day, not a bad life.
- You only live once but you do it right ONCE IS ENOUGH.
- Trust me you will dance- Alcohol
- When I talk to you I fall in love over and over again.
- In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
- Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
- When someone says, “You’ve Changed”, it simply means you’ve stopped living your life his or her way.
- The shattering of a heart when being broken is the loudest quiet ever.
- Happiness is when “Last seen at” changes to “online” and then to, “typing.”
- I raise my hand for an easy question, just so the teacher won’t ask me again.
- Is it vodka o’clock yet?
- Fall in love not in line.
- Loneliness is better than bad company.
- Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
- Everybody is born with genius, but most people only keep it a few minutes.
- My Hearts beats only for you.
- If you fall. I’ll be there.
- Being someone’s first love may be great, but to be his or her last is beyond perfect.
- Wow now I’m a graduate…….Now thermometer is not the only thing that has degrees without brains .
- Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.
- Everything is fair in Love and War.
- It will take time for me to succeed, because my road to success is under construction.
- It’s a good day to have a good day.
- Born to express not to impress.
- Insult and wife are somewhat similar….They always look good…If it is not yours
- If there is a “WILL”, there are 500 relatives.
- I’m done begging for your love.
- The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
- Life doesn’t get easier you just get stronger.
- I am so blind in love with you that I love even the most stupid thing you do.
- I meditate for 20 min every morning. It helps reduce stress of being 20 min late for everything
- I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
- Thinking of you is the easy part, but missing you is something I can’t handle.
- Excuse me..I found something under my shoes. .ohm it’s your Attitude.
- Love is friendship set to music- Joseph Campbell
- A female can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Depends on how you treat her.
- I don’t like cocaine; I just like the way it smells;)
- Math Rule: If it seems easy, you’re doing it wrong.
- All great changes are preceded by chaos.
- I don’t make mistakes I just date them.
- A bird just hit my window. I wonder if God is playing Angry Birds with me.
- Style is a way to say whom you are without having to speak. – Rachel Zoe
- Don’t drink and park – accidents cause people.
- You think you’re one of millions but you’re one in a million to me.
- Smile in front of people who hate you… Ur happiness kills them…
- I am a ninja, no, you are not. Did you see me do that? Do what? “Exactly”.
- Success is the best revenge for anything. _ Ed Sheer am
- This is the beginning of the sentence you just finished reading.
- You re special to me in every way. Thank you for being that you are.
- I am not questioning your honor. I am denying its existence.
- Respect is one of life’s greatest treasures…
- Be a good person, but don’t try to prove.
- Someone else is happy with less than what you have.
- Sleep till you’re hungry….Eat till you’re sleepy.
- Intelligence is like underwear. It’s important that you have it but there’s no need to show it off.
- If you can’t convince them, confuse them.
- Why am I so afraid to lose you when you’re not even mine?
- My laziness is like 8, when I lie down it becomes infinity ???? :p
- Our marriage is like a workshop. My wife shops and I work.
- I love buying new things but I hate spending money.
- I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.
- A lot of People are afraid to say what they want. That’s why they don’t get what they want.
- Don’t mind the weather, it’s raining in my heart tonight
- This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.
- Do what you fear and fear disappears
- The word ‘happiness’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.
- We got some awesome emotional status for Whatsapp to share your feelings. So let’s start.
- It’s better to be looked over, than overlooked.
- I don’t have an attitude problem I just have a personality you can’t handle.
- A good laugh and long sleep are two best cures for anything.
- Stop waiting for one Day. Today is the Day- Bang-Bang
- Marriage is a fine institution, but I’m not ready for an institution.
- If a hug tells how much I love you, I would hold you in my arms forever.
- I drink to make other people interesting.
- I can’t stop missing you.
- If you’ve never lost your mind, you’ve never followed your heart.
- Just because something isn’t happening for you right now doesn’t mean that will never happen.
- I never lie, I am a fiction speaker.
- Nothing is too small to know, and nothing is too big to attempt.
- Do more of what makes you happy.
- We are all part of the ultimate statistic – ten out of ten die.
- Fake people care about their status, real people give a damn.
- A pretty girl is nothing if she has an ugly heart.
- The truth may hurt for a little while but a lie hurts forever.
- Red meat is not bad for you. Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.
- I am not a heartthrob, but everybody still checks my status.
- I don’t have time to hate people, who hate me because; I’m too busy in loving people who love me.
That wraps up this guide on WhatsApp jokes and quotes. As you can see there is a wide range of options out there. From silly to insulting to insightful and thought provoking. Hopefully, you’ve gotten a good sense of some jokes you can tell during your next WhatsApp conversation and some quotes that you can drop to impress your friends. Let us know below how they worked out, did anyone laugh at your joke or did it fall flat? Does anyone like your quote or think it’s inspirational? Let us know below and help other people find their voice.